You know that feeling you get at the beginning of each new semester? And the promises you make to yourself? Promises to work harder, to manage your time better, and to accomplish all the things you kept putting off? Well, those feelings double when the start of a new semester coincides with the start of a new year. That’s right, it’s 2013 (sorry to all those people who were expecting something catastrophic like the end of the world to happen in 2012… life goes on!) and with the new year comes new expectations and new challenges, or in my case old challenges.
I guess the one thing I’m worried about the most this semester is my FYP (Final Year Project). This being my final semester, a lot of pressure is on my head to make good on my final thesis and actually graduate! On top of this, I am also in the midst of the daunting process that is job hunting in which I am expected to extend my boundaries, both personally and socially, beyond my comfort zone. I can barely get my head around the fact that in a mere 4 months’ time; the last leg of my higher education will officially come to an end, let alone having to grow up and go out into the ‘adult’ world (in my mind I am still a 17-year-old kid). I am not ready for this! Maybe this is the reason I keep putting off sending my résumé to potential employers even though it’s all typed up and ready to go. I’m just not ready to leave uni!
My whole life up to this moment has revolved around attending class, completing assignments, studying for exams, enjoying semester break… and repeat. In a way I don’t know how to be anything else but a student and the very thought of leaving that world that I know so well terrifies me to the core. I know we all come to this phase of our lives at one point or another, some people welcome it with open arms, others take a more cautious approach but we all get there in the end. It’s like when we were small and we go to the swimming pool for the first time. There are those kids who jump in head first without even knowing the depth of the water, then there are the kids who, with a little coaxing from their parents and/or friends, eventually wade out into the deep end, and then there’s me. In this analogy, I’d be the kid wrapped in the towel testing the water one toe at a time, sitting on the edge of the pool watching all the other kids have fun. I know that I’d join in and splash a little water in the end but it just takes me more time and effort (and mental preparation) to get there.
I guess what I’m trying to say is I need to embrace change instead of fearing it and I should mentally prepare myself for the challenges ahead because even though the road ahead may be rocky and uncertain, I’m 100% positive that the destination will be worth it in the end. One of my very best friends is expecting her first child any day now and when I think about the fact that she’s going to be a mum while I’m still thinking of myself as a child, it’s downright laughable. Looking at it from that perspective really makes me think to myself ‘I need to grow up and find my purpose in life!’
Having said that however, I’m going to enjoy and make the most out of what’s left of my student days and exploit those meager student discounts as much as possible. After all, you know what they say: “your university years are the best days of your life!”